Sunday, December 7, 2008

Reason #1,244,592 for Moving to the City

SNOWSQUALLS!

Okay so this is the part where I snivel and whine and complain like nobody's business. I don't even care that there's a fee for whining. In fact, allow me to pay my fee now, and double it since I want lots of whine-space, mkay? The thing is, if it were any other day, I wouldn't really care, but it's SUNDAY and I WANTED to go to church today, since I've already missed lots of Sundays due to being sick & various other seasonal/family stuff going on. Now I'm just sick of snow and wintery weather and it's NOT even winter yet! BAH!!

If you're not in a place where you get snowsqualls, then you might not know what they really are, or do. In a nutshell, they're like micro-blizzards. They usually last for just a few minutes but during those few minutes the snow is so thick and the winds are so harsh, you can't see in front of your face or keep your car in your lane (lane? what lane, where am I, and why is that gigantic truck headed right at me!?) or keep your balance very well if you happen to be standing or walking outside during one. In farm country where I live, they're essentially mini-whiteouts. They only last a few minutes but if they're in the forecast for ALL STINKING DAY (which they are today, and were last night), then that means off and on throughout the day at any given time, KAH-BLAMMO, here comes another one. No real warning, except for the forecast that said "travelling conditions are extremely dangerous you reckless, risk-taking dipstick, stay home!" Yes, they actually say that. More or less. Canadians are nothing if not creative when it comes to the warning page on the local weather site. They like to use words like "phenomenal" in the winter time.

So then, When you get these all day, and all night, they form these insane drifts everywhere, including right across the highway and the plows and salt trucks can't keep up. When they come on SUNDAY, it's Tough Cookies Bubba time, since the plows and the salt trucks don't come out as early on Sunday as they do on a work day. They usually start plowing around here just about the time our Sunday morning service starts. Nevermind about Sunday School and the fact that we have to leave our house at 9:20 to make Sunday School then the service at 11, the plows never even come around our way until somewhere between 10:30 and 11 on a Sunday. If it's REALLY bad, we might not even see them until later in the day. It is currently 11:26am and I still haven't seen a plow, or a salter on my road.

The other thing squalls do, is they turn my laneway (a driveway in the country that's usually really long, between the house and the road, and used by both residents of the farmhouse and the tractors and trucks that come and go to the barns & silos) into an ice rink. Hard, driving wind will turn semi-packed snow on a laneway into a solid sheet of ice. You know it's ice when you look out the window and it's sort of glowing, under the snow that is drifting across it. Even IF the plows show up to do the sideroads and highways, they never come down the laneway since it's private property. So, getting from the house to the road is another adventure all it's own. It's a risk I don't even take when I'm out of cream for my coffee (like now) or cheetos (like now). You know things are bad when Carla wont even go out for coffee supplies or her beloved cheetos.

So then, what are snowsqualls, anyway? That's a fine question and I'm glad you asked. The technical answer is that they are mini-snowstorms that happen when icy cold air moves over warmer, moist air over the Great Lakes, and essentially picks up that moisture and relocates it in the form of massive amounts of snow, just to the other side of the lake. Since we live just east Lake Huron, we're in snowsquall/snowband/snowbelt country. Sometimes we get them like mad, other times if they're in the forecast the wind shifts just to the north and we get snow, but not snow accompanied by squalls.

The benefit of moving into the city, is that even in snowsqualls, it's NOTHING like it is in the country. Plenty of houses and structures in the city that act as windbreaks so the drifts and the ice isn't nearly as much of an issue - plus - the city salters and plows are a lot more reliable and punctual 7 days a week, than county folks. Now don't get me wrong, these county folks are great and do a fine job, but there aren't as many of them as there are in the city, to clear these nutty roads.

In the city, you shovel your own driveway (no big whoop, I do it all the time) and don't have to worry if you're going to wipe out driving to the road because there's no laneway to deal with. Plus, if you have to, you can actually walk to the store, to get your dear french vanilla cream for your coffee, and your beloved cheetos, and anything else you ran out of RIGHT before the stinking ugly vicious snowsqualls came and buried your house. Oh, and rest assured, you WILL run out of these things RIGHT before the snowsqualls come, and you wont even know they were in the forecast until you realized you were out of these items AND the snowsqualls begin. It's true, it happens every winter, no matter how well I try to stock up. Personally, I think they could be renamed Sneaksqualls, but that doesn't flow off the tongue as well as snowsqualls.

Now, after all that whining, I do realize of course that God is in control of the weather, and He knows exactly what He's doing. I also realize that even for the lack of missing church again and being short on goodies, I have TONS to be thankful for, such as the wood thats heating my house today, the food in the fridge for supper, and (thankfully!) not being out of toilet paper. Indeed, all of our basic needs and more, are being met today, even if we're stuck in our house and had to miss the fellowship of the saints and the preaching of the word. I'm not at all ungrateful for what we do have, I'm just really frustrated with country living. Especially in the winter. Plus, if I had to walk to the store today, I'd end up Freezy the SnowMom, frozen in place at the edge of a cornfield on a country sideroad, between here and there. I think I'll forego the Winter Trek Adventure, and just go to Rachel's new room and just paint trim, instead.

/rant over



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